The Will to Change

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Hooks, Bell 저자(글)

Washington Square Press · 2004년 12월 01일

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In a social and cultural analysis, the author explores the world of masculinity and maleness to address some of men's most common concerns, including a fear of intimacy and the loss of their patriarchal place in society, arguing that an emotionally rewarding inner life holds the key to successful intimate relationships.
bell hooks is a cultural critic, a feminist theorist, and the renowned author of more than twenty books. A charismatic speaker, she divides her time between teaching, writing, and lecturing around the world. She lives in Kentucky and New York City.
Chapter One: Wanted: Men Who LoveEvery female wants to be loved by a male. Every woman wants to love and be loved by the males in her life. Whether gay or straight, bisexual or celibate, she wants to feel the love of father, grandfather, uncle, brother, or male friend. If she is heterosexual she wants the love of a male partner. We live in a culture where emotionally starved, deprived females are desperately seeking male love. Our collective hunger is so intense it rends us. And yet we dare not speak it for fear we will be mocked, pitied, shamed. To speak our hunger for male love would demand that we name the intensity of our lack and our loss. The male bashing that was so intense when contemporary feminism first surfaced more than thirty years ago was in part the rageful cover-up of the shame women felt not because men refused to share their power but because we could not seduce, cajole, or entice men to share their emotions -- to love us.By claiming that they wanted the power men had, man-hating feminists (who were by no means the majority) covertly proclaimed that they too wanted to be rewarded for being out of touch with their feelings, for being unable to love. Men in patriarchal culture responded to feminist demand for greater equity in the work world and in the sexual world by making room, by sharing the spheres of power. The place where most men refused to change -- believed themselves unable to change -- was in their emotional lives. Not even for the love and respect of liberated women were men willing to come to the table of love as equal partners ready to share the feast.No one hungers for male love more than the little girl or boy who rightfully needs and seeks love from Dad. He may be absent, dead, present in body yet emotionally not there, but the girl or boy hungers to be acknowledged, recognized, respected, cared for. All around our nation a billboard carries this message: "Each night millions of kids go to sleep starving -- for attention from their dads." Because patriarchal culture has already taught girls and boys that Dad's love is more valuable than mother love, it is unlikely that maternal affection will heal the lack of fatherly love. No wonder then that these girls and boys grow up angry with men, angry that they have been denied the love they need to feel whole, worthy, accepted. Heterosexual girls and homosexual boys can and do become the women and men who make romantic bonds the place where they quest to find and know male love. But that quest is rarely satisfied. Usually rage, grief, and unrelenting disappointment lead women and men to close off the part of themselves that was hoping to be touched and healed by male love. They learn then to settle for whatever positive attention men are able to give. They learn to overvalue it. They learn to pretend that it is love. They learn how not to speak the truth about men and love. They learn to live the lie.As a child I hungered for the love of my dad. I wanted him to notice me, to give me his attention and his affections. When I could not get him to notice me by being good and dutiful, I was willing to risk punishment to be bad enough to catch his gaze, to hold it, and to bear the weight of his heavy hand. I longed for those hands to hold, shelter, and protect me, to touch me with tenderness and care, but I accepted that this would never be. I knew at age five that those hands would acknowledge me only when they were bringing me pain, that if I could accept that pain and hold it close, I could be Daddy's girl. I could make him proud. I am not alone. So many of us have felt that we could win male love by showing we were willing to bear the pain, that we were willing to live our lives affirming that the maleness deemed truly manly because it withholds, withdraws, refuses is the maleness we desire. We learn to love men more because they will not love us. If they dared to love us, in patriarchal culture they would ceas
Everyone needs to love and be loved -- even men. But to know love, men must be able to look at the ways that patriarchal culture keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, from loving. InThe Will to Change,bell hooks gets to the heart of the matter and shows men how to express the emotions that are a fundamental part of who they are -- whatever their age, marital status, ethnicity, or sexual orientation.With trademark candor and fierce intelligence, hooks addresses the most common concerns of men, such as fear of intimacy and loss of their patriarchal place in society, in new and challenging ways. She believes men can find the way to spiritual unity by getting back in touch with the emotionally open part of themselves -- and lay claim to the rich and rewarding inner lives that have historically been the exclusive province of women. A brave and astonishing work,The Will to Changeis designed to help men reclaim the best part of themselves.
Everyone needs to love and be loved -- even men. But to know love, men must be able to look at the ways that patriarchal culture keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, from loving. In The Will to Change, bell hooks gets to the heart of the matter and shows men how to express the emotions that are a fundamental part of who they are -- whatever their age, marital status, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. With trademark candor and fierce intelligence, hooks addresses the most common concerns of men, such as fear of intimacy and loss of their patriarchal place in society, in new and challenging ways. She believes men can find the way to spiritual unity by getting back in touch with the emotionally open part of themselves -- and lay claim to the rich and rewarding inner lives that have historically been the exclusive province of women. A brave and astonishing work, The Will to Change is designed to help men reclaim the best part of themselves.
Everyone needs to love and be loved -- even men. But to know love, men must be able to look at the ways that patriarchal culture keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, from loving. InThe Will to Change,bell hooks gets to the heart of the matter and shows men how to express the emotions that are a fundamental part of who they are -- whatever their age, marital status, ethnicity, or sexual orientation.With trademark candor and fierce intelligence, hooks addresses the most common concerns of men, such as fear of intimacy and loss of their patriarchal place in society, in new and challenging ways. She believes men can find the way to spiritual unity by getting back in touch with the emotionally open part of themselves -- and lay claim to the rich and rewarding inner lives that have historically been the exclusive province of women. A brave and astonishing work,The Will to Changeis designed to help men reclaim the best part of themselves.
George Weinbergauthor of Why Men Won't Commit[A] compelling study of the culture's unfairness to men.
George Weinbergauthor ofWhy Men Won't Commit[A] compelling study of the culture's unfairness to men.
George Weinbergauthor ofWhy Men Won't Commit[A] compelling study of the culture's unfairness to men.
George Weinberg author of Why Men Won't Commit Compelling study of the culture's unfairness to men.
George Weinbergauthor of Why Men Won't CommitCompelling study of the culture's unfairness to men.
Publishers WeeklyA fierce...denunciation of patriarchy and a clarion call to the uncommitted to align themselves with visionary radical feminism.
Publishers WeeklyA fierce...denunciation of patriarchy and a clarion call to the uncommitted to align themselves with visionary radical feminism.
Bell Hooks has been called one of America's,leading public intellectuals. Created in response,to her in-depth discussions with men the Will to,Change challenges men to reclaim the sensitivity,and love that today's embattled masculinity has,forsaken. With her trademark candour and fierce,intelligence, Hooks answers the most common,concerns of men - from fears of intimacy to the,loss of their patriarchal place in society. The,result is a book that can help men to feel, to,need and to desire openly - qualities that will,allow them to thrive as they never have before.
ContentsPreface: About Men1 Wanted: Men Who Love2 Understanding Patriarchy3 Being a Boy4 Stopping Male Violence5 Male Sexual Being6 Work: What's Love Got to Do with It?7 Feminist Manhood8 Popular Culture: Media Masculinity9 Healing Male Spirit10 Reclaiming Male Integrity11 Loving Men

작가정보

저자(글) Hooks, Bell

bell hooks was a cultural critic, a feminist icon, and the renowned author of more than twenty books, including the enduring classic New York Times bestseller All About Love, Rock My Soul, The Will to Change, Sisters of the Yam, and When Angels Speak of Love. A charismatic speaker, she divided her time between teaching, writing, and lecturing around the world. She passed away in 2021.

목차

• Preface: About Men
  Wanted: Men Who Love
  Understanding Patriarchy
  Being a Boy
  Stopping Male Violence
  Male Sexual Being
  Work: What's Love Got to Do with It?
  Feminist Manhood
  Popular Culture: Media Masculinity
  Healing Male Spirit
  Reclaiming Male Integrity
  Loving Men
  Table of Contents provided by Publisher. All Rights Reserved.

기본정보

ISBN	9780743456081 ( 0743456084 )
발행(출시)일자	2004년 12월 01일
쪽수	224쪽
크기	135 * 206 * 15 mm / 159 g
총권수	1권
언어	영어